This is a True story

A guy working in a "hotel" answered the phone ringing in the kitchen,

so he heard : "tou ti tou roum tou"

so he replied directly "ta ta ta tou tou tou" and hung down the phone.


After a while he was fired by the manager for doing such a thing ,

because the man who called the room service was asking him on the phone

to send " 2 tea to room 2"

Men

Laph.com Quotes Aug 31, 2006

Quotes of the day

1- Failure doesn't mean: "You'll never make it". It means: "It will take a little longer".
2- Opportunity is missed by most because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
3- Believe in miracles, but don't depend on them.
4- Ask a question and you're a fool for three minutes; do not ask a question and you're a fool for the rest of your life.
5- Before you point your fingers, be sure your hands are clean.

www.laph.com

Back to school!

Fascinating animals, birds, trees :

1) SNAILS have 14175 teeth laid along 135 rows on their tongue.
2) A BUTTERFLY has 12,000 eyes.
3) DOLPHINS sleep with 1 eye open.
4) A BLUE WHALE can eat as much as 3 tones of food everyday, but at the same time can live without food for 6 months.

5) The EARTH has over 12,00,000 species of animals, 3,00,000 species of plants & 1,00,000 other species.
6) The fierce DINOSAUR was TYRANNOSAURS which has sixty long & sharp teeth, used to attack & eat other dinosaurs.
7) DEMETRIO was a mammal like REPTILE with a snail on its back. This acted as a radiator to cool the body of the animal.

8) CASSOWARY is one of the dangerous BIRD, that can kill a man or animal by tearing off with its dagger like claw.
9) The SWAN has over 25,000 feathers in its body.
10) OSTRICH eats pebbles to help digestion by grinding up the ingested food.
11) POLAR BEAR can look clumsy & slow but during chase on ice, can reach 25 miles / hr of speed.
12) KIWIS are the only birds, which hunt by sense of smell.
13) ELEPHANT teeth can weigh as much as 9 pounds.
14) OWL is the only bird, which can rotate its head to 270 degrees.

Oxymorons.info ( Contradictory Words ) Aug 31, 2006

Oxymorons of the day

1- Controlled Chaos.
2- External Income.
3- Highly Depressed.

www.oxymorons.info

Lessons in Logic

"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk
...................................
"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours
...................................
God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.
...................................

Today's generation

How to stop people from bugging you about getting married

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

Do not Disturb I am online

Confidence,Trust and Hope

CONFIDENCE
Once all village people decided to pray for rain.
On the day of prayer all people gathered and only one boy came with an
umbrella that's confidence...........

TRUST
Trust should be like the feeling of a one year old baby when you throw him
in the air , he laughs......
because he knows you will catch him........

HOPE
A human being can live for
4 days without water
8 minutes without air
but not even 1 second without hope....

SO ALWAYS HAVE CONFIDENCE, TRUST OTHERS AND NEVER LOSE HOPE

Funny

Laph.com Quotes Aug 26, 2006

Quotes of the day

1- Death is not a period but a comma in the story of life.
2- The most wasted day is that in which we have not laughed. -- Chamfort
3- Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?
4- Dance as if no one's watching, love as if it's never going to hurt. -- Stuart Appleby
5- Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt. -- Herbert Hoover

www.laph.com

Life explained

Oxymorons.info ( Contradictory Words ) Aug 26, 2006

Oxymorons of the day

1- Small Fortune.
2- Virtual Life.
3- Big Baby.

www.oxymorons.info

Lessons in Logic

Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.
..............................
"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep
..............................
There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning
..............................

Woman Tools

Romance Mathematics

smart man + smart woman = romance

smart man + dumb woman = affair

dumb man + smart woman = marriage

dumb man + dumb woman = baby

Sea Beast

Laph.com Quotes Aug 22, 2006

Quotes of the day

1- Why do we say there is nothing on TV tonight when there obviously is something on?
2- Love makes the world go around, but money greases the wheel!
3- High life not low life!
4- Why isn't there mouse flavoured cat food?
5- Coming together is a beginning, keeping together is a progress, working together is success!

www.laph.com

Twisted New Type of Body Art

Oxymorons.info ( Contradictory Words ) Aug 22, 2006

Oxymorons of the day

1- Little Bit Big.
2- Non-dairy Creamer.
3- Quiet Revolution.

www.oxymorons.info

Joke of the day

A lady tells her Man: "I demand good manners in bed, just like at the dinner table".

The man climbs into bed slowly and says:

"Honey, would you please pass me the vagina?"

Funny Pics

The Best Moments In Life

1. Falling in love.
2. Laughing till your stomach hurts.
3. Enjoying a ride down the ocuntry side.
4. Listening to your favorite song on the radio.
5. Going to sleep listening to the rain pouring outside.
6. Getting out of the shower and wrapping yourself with a warm, fuzzy towel.
7. Passing your final exams with good grades.
8. Being part of an interesting conversation.
9. Finding some money in some old pants.
10. Laughing at yourself.
11. Sharing a wonderful dinner with all your friends.
12. Laughing without a reason.
13. "Accidentally" hearing someone say somthing good about you.
14. Watching the sunset.
15. Listening to a song that reminds you of an important person in your life.
16. Receiving or giving your first kiss.
17. Feeling this movement in your body when seeing this "special" someone.
18. Having a great time with your friends.
19. Seeing the one you love happy.
20. Wearing the shirt of a person you love and smelling his/her perfume.
21. Visiting an old friend of yours and remembering great memories.
22. Hearing someone telling you "I LOVE YOU".

Error messages everyone can understand

The Nine Important Men in a Woman's Life:

1. The Doctor: because he says: "Take your clothes off."
2. The Dentist: because he says: "Open wide."
3. The Hairdresser: because he says: "Do you want it teased or blown?"
4. The Milkman: because he says: "Do you want it in the front or the back?"
5. The Interior Decorator: because he says: "Once it's in, you'll love it!"
6. The Stock Broker: because he says: "It will rise right up, fluctuate for a while, and then slowly fall back again."
7. The Banker: because he says: "If you take it out too soon, you'll lose interest.
8. The Hunter: because he goes deep in the bush, shoots twice, and always eats what he shoots.
9. The Telephone Guy: because he says, "Would you like it on the table or up against the wall?

Ronaldinho after the 2006 World Cup

Laph.com Quotes Aug 18, 2006

Quotes of the day

1- If you want God to laugh, tell him your future plans.
2- Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
3- Change your thoughts and you change your world.
4- By the time you learn the rules of life, you're too old to play the game.
5- Born twice, die once. Born once, die twice.

www.laph.com

Cars that You Don't See Every Day

Oxymorons.info ( Contradictory Words ) Aug 18, 2006

Oxymorons of the day

1- Close Distance.
2- Dynamic Stability.
3- Gourmet Fast Food.

www.oxymorons.info

Q & A

Q What's the difference between people who pray in church and those who pray in casinos?
A: The ones in the casinos are really serious!

What did you do with the cheese?

Laph.com Quotes Aug 13, 2006

Quotes of the day

1- Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
2- Hating hate does not mean you love love!
3- Love was not put in your heart to stay. Love is not love until you give it away.
4- The more you sweat in peace , the less you bleed in war.
5- You know your children are growing up when they stop asking where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.

www.laph.com

Romeo and Juliet

Oxymorons.info ( Contradictory Words ) Aug 13, 2006

Oxymorons of the day

1- Short Distance.
2- True Lies.
3- Arms Limitation.

www.oxymorons.info

In 24 hours average human.

1) HEART beats 1,03,689 times.
2) LUNGS respire 23,045 times.
3) BLOOD flows 16,80,000 miles.
4) NAILS grow 0.00007 inches
5) HAIR grows 0.01715 inches
6) Take 2.9 pounds WATER (including all liquids)
7) Take of 3.25 pounds FOOD.
8) Breathe 438 cubic feet AIR.
9) Lose 85.60, BODY TEMPERATURE.
10) Produce 1.43 pints SWEAT.
11) Speak 4,800 WORDS.
12) During SLEEP move 25.4 times

Skills found only in China

Lessons in Logic

Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
..............................
Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in
life.
..............................
The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise .

Hotdog sandwich

Laph.com Quotes Aug 09, 2006

Quotes of the day

1- A person who makes no mistakes, generally makes nothing.
2- A rumor is as hard to unspread as butter.
3- Always forgive your enemies but never forget their names.
4- B(est) I(nformation) B(efore) L(eaving) E(arth).
5- Choose your love, love your choice.

www.laph.com

Massive Dog

Oxymorons.info ( Contradictory Words ) Aug 09, 2006

Oxymorons of the day

1- Junk Food.
2- Natural Makeup.
3- Pleasing Pain.

www.oxymorons.info

Lessons in Logic

Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.
........................................
How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?
........................................
Money is not everything. There's Mastercard & Visa.
........................................
One should love animals. They are so tasty.
........................................

How to make your kid say sorry

Laph.com Quotes Aug 04, 2006

Quotes of the day

1- A man who lives in a glass house should change in basement.
2- A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
3- The only way to make sure people you agree with can speak is to support the rights of people you don't agree with.
4- Sometimes the grieves of whom we love hurt us more than our own!
5- A penny will hide the biggest star in the universe if you hold it close enough to your eye.

www.laph.com

Mom, I think i need your help

Joke of the day

"I am your Doctor. Sorry to inform you that you have a
Brain problem. Your brain is in 2 parts... Left and
Right.

The left part has nothing right in it, and the right
Has nothing left in it"

Oxymorons.info ( Contradictory Words ) Aug 04, 2006

Oxymorons of the day

1- Canned Fresh.
2- Dim wit.
3- Fresh from Concentrate.

www.oxymorons.info