Corporate Vocabulary

What those words on yearly performance reviews REALLY mean

1- Outgoing Personality - Always going out of the office.
2- Great Presentation Skills - Able to bullshit.
3- Good Communication Skills - Spends lots of time on phone.
4- Work is first priority - Too ugly to get a date.
5- Active Socially - Drinks a lot.
6- Independent Worker - Nobody knows what he/she does.
7- Quick Thinking - Offer plausible excuses.
8- Careful Thinker - Won't make a decision.
9- Uses Logic on Difficult Jobs - Gets someone else to do it.
10- Expresses Themselves well - Speaks English.
11- Meticulous Attention to Detail - Anit picker.
12- Has Leadership Qualities - Is tall or has a louder voice.
13- Exceptionally Good Judgment - Lucky.
14- Keen Sense of Humor - Knows a lot of dirty jokes.
15- Career Minded - Back stabber.
16- Loyal - Can't get a job anywhere else.
17- Plans for Promotion/Advancement - Buys drinks for all the boys.
18- Of Great Value to the Organisation - Gets to work on time.
19- Relaxed Attitude - Sleeps at desk.